Beware of the new breed of men. He is good looking and well groomed. Have you noticed that it is becoming difficult to distinguish male from female behaviour today? I am told it’s because men are learning to embrace their sexuality. Personally I hate it. We were created differently for a reason other than sexual compatibility. This trend of unisex is spreading rapidly.
As a result we have the equivalent of the “dumb blonde.â€
Like the female variant, this breed of men is cute. They are usually slim, tall, light or dark skinned or of average build showing their six pack and wear tit- revealing T-shirts. You cannot miss to see both earlobes pricked accompanied by diamond studs.
Real men are uncomfortable near these guys who should not be confused for jerks.
Jerks are like crows. It is for this reason that I insist on bringing to your attention the difference between the elusive good guys who you will never marry. The jerks lie and break hearts. Their behaviour is pretty unpredictable. If you ignore him, he treats it like a turn on. If you abuse him, you appeal to his resilience. If you succumb he will dump you, when caught red-handed he will deny. If you fall in love you will be used. If you get pregnant, he will take a walk for ever.
As ironic as it may seem, this is the type of guy who appeals to the average Ugandan female, which explains why they all have the same sob story about some jerk who slept with them, then turned over and snored. For a long time these jerks have prowled, leaving shattered hearts in their wake. Until now, their dominance is unrivalled.
They are only good- for-show cuties whose only claim to fame is a cute face.
Now don’t pretend to be surprised. I happened to catch some local male “celebs†hanging out in a beauty parlour, not a barber shop for your information. They had facial masks on, cucumbers on their eyes and were waiting in the queue to be manicured and pedicured. When did men get so lazy that they cannot find time to clip their own toenails?
Irene my sister thinks it is cool for men to groom themselves. Men now exfoliate their faces and visit saloons!
It is what women demand-- cute pets. Guys are now keeping ripened avocado in their fridges, not for the health salads but for a face mask. What the hell is going on?
This breed of guys speak something like, “Man, that chic has the latest play station at her crib†or worse, “did you see the ride she spins?†Please guys give us a break. They wait to be offered drinks. They wine, are moody, shop cosmetics, spend a lot of money on clothes and they gossip.
They are a total disgrace. The sad thing is that there are women like them.
I guess the game has come full swing.
  There is this type of men, I call them dot.com./jokers. If this kind of man ever asked you out, hahahaa believe you me, he is not fun to hang out with but in a life time you need to give it a try.
Unlike some Ugandan men, they are easy to identify from their arrogant behaviour while in public places especially average to high class eat-outs or entertainment spots. Not as in the case of the “dumb male blondeâ€, who has a simple natural appearance that looks innocent and with a friendly face.
It takes decades or more than 3000 kilometres before they lay eyes on decent ladies not because the ladies are out of reach but because they do not have a proper strategy or vibe to convince these ladies. I mean the ladies have got more brain matter than these lads. This kind of men is a bit widespread throughout the country, so the elite woman is trying to avoid them but before you know a dozen more of this type spring up.
 When you stare in the face of this wannabe, you will discover he is so daft because he cannot get it through his thick skull that you are damn bored of his hallucinations or is it called illusions.
Because he has asked you out for dinner, you decide to give it a try and accept his invitation to a restaurant. On reaching there, he is already seated. Does not give the curtsey to stand up and welcome you like a gentleman would do. Beyond misery, the goon has ordered a very cheap wine, oba manufactured from which country, instead of asking you what kind of wine you would like to take so that you can choose. May be the South African Shiraz wouldn’t have been a bad idea. The guy has not even ordered for reservation of that table yet he claims to be “munene muneneâ€. Before you are done with this sort of insult, he is fidgeting with his phone making those comedian calls like “Have my containers arrived from Mombasaâ€? “emaali yaffe†from Dubai. You know what I am talking about. Then he whispers intentionally but loudly pretending so that you can hear. “I mean the Range Rovers...†You know talking too much out of disproportion! I am told that’s called “wolokoso†nowadays. Oh! These type of men are irritating, they carry over four phone hand sets. What for? Someone please tell me.
 Somewhat, overwhelmed by this uncouth manners I excuse my myself and catwalk through the lounge of this unfamiliar restaurant and get to the exit. The wannabe is wondering where I have gone. But he is so daft that he still expects to hear from me the next day. I have no regret leaving this facility without having the dinner. I feel free, some kind of burden has been taken off my shoulders. Joy and happiness is all I need. This is a world of reality not a euphoric/ irrational paradise created by this joker/dot.com men.
According to my late grandma, a woman measures a man’s strength by either his character or his loins.
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written by Whaaaat?, September 07, 2010
thnk you.
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really good reading Caro, well done